WIL WHEATON: Most of the time we’re playing games to escape the real world. But some games are so much fun we play them even though the game world is so much scarier than the one we are hoping to leave behind, a game where the players are the only thing that stands between life and horrible, shivering, puking, bleeding, miserable death. Today on tabletop my friends Robert Gifford, Ed Brubaker and Morgan Webb are here, for a game that we don’t so much play as desperately hope to survive.
Wash your hands and put on a face mask, because we are the world’s last, best hope to stop a pandemic. Pandemic is a cooperative game, where we all work together as members of a disease-fighting team that is headquartered in Atlanta, Georgia. Now, we’re not the team you’re thinking of– unless you’re thinking of a team I just made up, that lives together in a van in a parking lot across the street from the CDC. Our goal is to travel around the world treating localized outbreaks and epidemics, to prevent them from joining together into a global pandemic.
Eh? See? It’s not just a clever name, it actually describes the game. Each turn, we will perform four actions. Basic actions, like moving around the board and treating disease, or special actions, like discovering a cure or using a player’s special, unique ability.
Then we will draw cards from this deck that should help us, and find out where the disease is spreading next. Now there are many ways to lose in Pandemic, but only one way to win. And that is by eradicating all four diseases.
Remember that deck that I said should help us? That deck contains the most dangerous, awful cards in the entire game, epidemic cards. These tell us where epidemics have happened, which can lead to outbreaks that will spread around the globe, leading to our inevitable defeat.
Pandemic is incredibly intense. It’s exciting. It’s unbelievably difficult. But I’ve had more fun losing this game then I have had winning a lot of others.
Now we will find out if we win together or if the entire world dies, because it is time to play Pandemic. MORGAN WEBB: My name is Morgan Webb and I host a TV show on G4 TV, and it’s called X-Play. ROBERT GIFFORD: My name is Robert Gifford and I own the company Geek Chic, and we make geek furniture and accessories for geek living. ED BRUBAKER: My name’s Ed Brubaker and I am a comic book writer and screenwriter.
I write for Marvel Comics, I write Captain America for the last seven or eight years. I wrote the famous “Death of Captain America” storyline a few years back. WIL WHEATON: In the official rules of Pandemic the person who goes first is the person who was most recently sick which, for our purposes, I think is a little pedestrian. Sorry, Matt, love you, but I have a better idea.
Who has had the most outrageous, crazy disease? Like, who’s had the worst sickness? I’m going to go first. In 2009, at PAX Prime in Seattle, I got the swine flu.
ROBERT GIFFORD: I actually also acquired the H1Nerd1 virus from PAX. WIL WHEATON: Oh, right on. ED BRUBAKER: H1Nerd1. MORGAN WEBB: Actually, I got that as well. And remember– I don’t know if you remember, on the PAX website they tracked the flight that it came in on.
And then they tracked all the flights that it came out on. And of course I was on one of those outgoing flights. WIL WHEATON: I was on one of the outgoing flights as well. Wait, so we all got the PAX flu? Really? MORGAN WEBB: The PAX pox.
ED BRUBAKER: But I, in 1990, had repetitive strep throat for six months, where I would be sick with strep throat, and I would go to the hospital to the emergency room and they would give me medication. And I would get better for like two weeks, and then I would be sick again. So I woke up one day and my left eardrum had burst, and I was bleeding all over the pillow.
WIL WHEATON: I think you go first. ROBERT GIFFORD: Winner. WIL WHEATON: Yeah. Winner.
I think Ed goes first. ED BRUBAKER: Yes. I win. I win! WIL WHEATON: Alright.
So normally, when we play Pandemic, at this point in the game we would draw some cards and figure out where the infection is on the board. But you don’t want to watch that, so we did that before we all sat down. So the initial big infection cities– it looks like it’s Miami, London, St. Petersburg, and then there’s some other little things around the globe. We should talk about our roles real quick.
I’m the scientist, Ed’s the researcher, Robert is the dispatcher, and Morgan is the medic. MORGAN WEBB: I’m the healer. WIL WHEATON: Yep.
That’s nice. ED BRUBAKER: The healer. WIL WHEATON: So we are all starting out in Atlanta. Ed, you’re up. So you got four actions.
How would you like to spend them? You can walk to Miami. ED BRUBAKER: I can walk to Miami. ROBERT GIFFORD: Drive. Take a bus. WIL WHEATON: Yeah.
ROBERT GIFFORD: With a lot of other guys. WIL WHEATON: You could ride on a donkey, if you wanted to. ED BRUBAKER: Alright. I’m going to go here.
How many of these can I take away? WIL WHEATON: You can take one– MORGAN WEBB: Take one– ED BRUBAKER: One for each action? MORGAN WEBB: Yes. WIL WHEATON: Two, three, four. You can take away all three of them, if you want to. ED BRUBAKER: I can take away all three.
OK. Morgan and I, I guess, had both not played the game before. Wil and Robert both have played this game so many times, apparently. WIL WHEATON: The fact that the very experienced players and the brand new players are all working together so well illustrates why I love cooperative games. Alright, so let’s flip your cards and see what you get.
You’ve got– ooh, a good card. MORGAN WEBB: Ooh! Special event. WIL WHEATON: A specia event. ED BRUBAKER: So– OK.
So I will save this until we need it then, right? And then I get a second card. WIL WHEATON: And then your second card is [INAUDIBLE]. ED BRUBAKER: Whoo. And I get to keep that.
Alright. WIL WHEATON: And now let’s find out where the infection spreads. Morgan, you want to put a blue in New York? MORGAN WEBB: I don’t really. But I’m gonna go ahead and do that.
WIL WHEATON: OK. I will put a black in Kolkata which I believe is here. The first turn is over.
OK, Robert, you’re up. ROBERT GIFFORD: OK. So I’m a dispatcher, so I can move other people around.
Which seems like a good idea. I think I’m going to just launch Morgan out to London, if I can. ED BRUBAKER: Yeah, I was gonna say, you should be shipping Morgan all over the world. ROBERT GIFFORD: My role, I’m just kind of putting people where they need to go.
I’m the dispatcher, and I fly people to locations where they need to be. WIL WHEATON: We have a really good combination with the dispatcher and the medic. And Robert’s able to get Morgan where she needs to be, and we can get a lot of stuff down pretty quickly. So let’s see what cards you get. Jakarta and Algiers.
OK, so we’re spreading infection now, right? Alright. So Ed, why don’t you put a red on Seoul up here. ED BRUBAKER: I like that they’re above the city. It’s like they’re hovering in the atmosphere, waiting for a good rain to bring it down. WIL WHEATON: Morgan, you’re up.
MORGAN WEBB: I’m so excited. OK. So for my first action, we’re going to clear London. WIL WHEATON: Morgan’s special ability as the medic is that she can clear all the cubes of a disease out of a city. MORGAN WEBB: I’m pretty awesome. WIL WHEATON: Yeah.
In one action. MORGAN WEBB: So my second action. My third action. And then my fourth action. ED BRUBAKER: Oh my God. Wow.
WIL WHEATON: Wow, that’s great. ED BRUBAKER: Yeah, we’re totally going to win. MORGAN WEBB: Fortunately, I’m playing as the medic. This is more of the healer, the support character. So they are able to move me a lot of places, and then I just kind of pick up disease.
I feel like I’m helping, I feel like I’m being awesome. WIL WHEATON: OK, so Morgan, you get Manila. ED BRUBAKER: Oh, Manila.
MORGAN WEBB: Very nice. WIL WHEATON: There you go. MORGAN WEBB: Always wanted Manila. WIL WHEATON: And you get– epidemic! ED BRUBAKER: Oh, come on!
Morgan! MORGAN WEBB: That was not my fault! WIL WHEATON: Oh, and for everyone watching at home, if you have played Pandemic before, you can set the difficulty of Pandemic by how many epidemic cards you put into the deck.
You can play on sort of an easy level, where there’s two or three epidemics. You can play all the way up to the legendary level, where there are six epidemic cards in the “it’s going to help you” deck. MORGAN WEBB: And guess what we’re playing on. WIL WHEATON: Legendary! ROBERT GIFFORD: That’s right. ED BRUBAKER: Wil informed us we’re playing on legendary status.
So I guess that’s really bad. WIL WHEATON: The first thing you do is you move the infection rate indicator up by one thing. Now we infect.
This is a great mechanic. This is one of the absolutely amazing, wonderful things about this game. MORGAN WEBB: And be great you mean terrible? WIL WHEATON: No, I mean it’s terrific. Every city in the game is represented one time in this infection deck. So we go into the infection deck.
We take the bottom card off the infection deck, and then we find out that this disease will now spread in Beijing. So put three cubes on Beijing. Alright. Now what we do is the step called intensify.
This is where we take the discard pile. ED BRUBAKER: Intensify! WIL WHEATON: We shuffle the discard pile around. MORGAN WEBB: Fine, it is a good mechanic. Whatever. WIL WHEATON: No, it’s great.
Isn’t it a super-great mechanic? MORGAN WEBB: No, it is really– a lot about this game is really clever. ED BRUBAKER: It’s totally funny when it’s not happening to you. WIL WHEATON: Are we satisfied with my shuffling– MORGAN WEBB: I am satisfied. WIL WHEATON: Of these cards?
ROBERT GIFFORD: Only once we see the results. MORGAN WEBB: Yeah. WIL WHEATON: There’s not a lot of cards. I can’t really riffle it. I These go back here, and that is the end of that.
ED BRUBAKER: Oh, so places that have already been sick can get sick again. WIL WHEATON: But now– MORGAN WEBB: There’s only 17 more epidemics in there. WIL WHEATON: We spread the infection. Alright, so.
MORGAN WEBB: That’s my good luck. WIL WHEATON: Mexico City. So put one cube on Mexico City, which now has two. MORGAN WEBB: I don’t know what I’m looking for for good luck here. WIL WHEATON: You’re looking for not Beijing, that’s what you’re looking for.
ED BRUBAKER: You’re looking for not Beijing. MORGAN WEBB: New York. WIL WHEATON: New York. MORGAN WEBB: OK. WIL WHEATON: Now it is me.
I am the scientist. The scientist’s special ability is that I only need four cards of the same color to cure a disease, instead of the usual five. So I’m going to go to Chicago, and say hello to my friends who live there. What’s up, [INAUDIBLE]? MORGAN WEBB: What’s up guys?
WIL WHEATON: Good to see you. And then I’m going to go to Mexico City. ROBERT GIFFORD: Say hello to your friends there?
WIL WHEATON: I’m like, seriously, you guys, wash your freakin’ hands. MORGAN WEBB: Hola. WIL WHEATON: OK, I’m gonna go there.
And then I’m going to come to Miami. MORGAN WEBB: We actually tried to make a strategy for this game when we first started. We thought that we were going to cure the yellow disease. WIL WHEATON: OK. You’re up, Ed.
ED BRUBAKER: So I- am going to– does this count as an action when I give you stuff, or is it just part of my character? WIL WHEATON: I believe that is– shared knowledge is an action. So that will be two actions for you. ED BRUBAKER: So I’m going to share those. WIL WHEATON: That’s two actions. ED BRUBAKER: Did you hear about these places?
WIL WHEATON: Two, three, four, five, six. I am one card away from my hand limit. That’s important. ED BRUBAKER: From your hand limit, yeah. Don’t go over your hand limit.
And then I’m going to cure this– WIL WHEATON: That’s three. ED BRUBAKER: Other outbreak, and be like dude, I just fixed you. I am the researcher, so I can go to anywhere, anyone else’s, and just give them my cards.
We thought, oh, yellow looks like it’s going to really take over. And we all were starting to move towards that. WIL WHEATON: And now this is going to happen. Chennai, in India. That’s down here, right? OK, so that’s– MORGAN WEBB: That’s too bad.
WIL WHEATON: That’s not happy. And Beijing. ED BRUBAKER: Oh! MORGAN WEBB: Noo! WIL WHEATON: Guess what, everybody? That’s a outbreak!
So. Put one in Seoul. Put one in Shanghai. And then we should be really grateful that that’s all that happened with that outbreak, because it could have been so much worse. ED BRUBAKER: It only connects to two.
WIL WHEATON: And move the outbreak up one. ROBERT GIFFORD: Up one. WIL WHEATON: And remember, I said that there are a lot of ways to lose this game. One of the ways to lose this game is if the outbreak indicator gets all the way up to that little skull and crossbones, which is the universal symbol for you just lost the game. MORGAN WEBB: Yes.
For bad, bad things are gonna happen. WIL WHEATON: Pandemic is a very unpredictable game. The only thing that you can predict and be absolutely certain of is that, when you think you’ve got things under control, the wheels are going to fall off your little wagon of curing disease. WIL WHEATON: OK, so. Two actions. I’m gonna clean– ED BRUBAKER: You can stay in disease-ridden Tokyo.
WIL WHEATON: I’m gonna clean that. MORGAN WEBB: It’s beautiful here. ED BRUBAKER: It’s beautiful here!
WIL WHEATON: Do I want to go to Miami for my third action, and wait there? ROBERT GIFFORD: You’re closer to a research station at that point, so why not? WIL WHEATON: I’m just going to stay in Miami. MORGAN WEBB: It’s beautiful there too.
WIL WHEATON: Yep. It is. ROBERT GIFFORD: Where have you gone?
You’ve just like sort of taken a trip down south, come back up, like, listen– MORGAN WEBB: We’ve all traveled the world. WIL WHEATON: You guys– you guys, it’s winter! I want to stay where it’s warm and nice.
What’s wrong with you? OK, here we go. Let’s find out what this card is. Be yellow. No!
What part of “be yellow” did you not understand, you [BLEEP]. ROBERT GIFFORD: The stakes of this game just keep getting higher and higher. You sort of go, mm– you start to name them after a while. It’s like, hm, that’s clearly neteller Canada. And that’s– ED BRUBAKER: Yeah. MORGAN WEBB: One of them is the PAX pox.
ROBERT GIFFORD: That’s swine– that’s the PAX pox. It’s gotta be blue. Blue is definitely swine flu. And red is the avian flu.
Black is zombies, because that’s the– came out of the Middle East, I’m positive. WIL WHEATON: This happens every time we play Pandemic. With experienced players, with new players, you name the diseases.
For whatever reason, red is always the bird flu. And one of the diseases is always the zombie outbreak. I get to draw one more card. Yes! ED BRUBAKER: Oh, awesome. WIL WHEATON: That is good news for us.
ROBERT GIFFORD: Fantastic. WIL WHEATON: That is good, good news. But now– MORGAN WEBB: It is good news for the people of the world. WIL WHEATON: This is less-good news. Chennai is going to outbreak. It’s black in Bangkok, and it’s black in Jakarta.
So this right here, that’s what we call super-happy-not-good bad news. ROBERT GIFFORD: And the outbreak meter moves to two. WIL WHEATON: OK, now– Kolkata!
ED BRUBAKER: Oh, what! ED BRUBAKER: Oh my God, what? WIL WHEATON: OK, so watch what happens now.
Chennai hits to Delhi, Chennai hits to Bangkok. ROBERT GIFFORD: Is that two more outbreaks, or one more outbreak? Because the original outbreak was– WIL WHEATON: That’s going to be two. ROBERT GIFFORD: It’s going to be two. WIL WHEATON: Because we went from Kolkata, and we hit that again.
So that’s two. ROBERT GIFFORD: Two. Indeed. WIL WHEATON: So this is super-bad news.
WIL WHEATON: Ugh. The worst thing ever was getting that black zombie plague chain reaction double-outbreak, because we had one on our outbreak meter and we went up to four, in just one bouncing feedback loop. You get up to eight outbreaks and you lose. So we went from being 90% away from defeat to halfway to losing, in one turn.
Also, another way that you can lose the game is if you run out of cubes. ED BRUBAKER: Oh, are you kidding me? WIL WHEATON: Because these cubes represent sick people. ROBERT GIFFORD: Or zombies. WIL WHEATON: Or zombies.
ED BRUBAKER: Or zombies. Those are zombies. WIL WHEATON: So we are actually now– it might not seem like it, but we’re actually at risk for running out of black cubes. ED BRUBAKER: So apparently the board can kick your ass really easily and quick.y WIL WHEATON: It’s the hardest game in the world. Yeah. ED BRUBAKER: There are so many places with three that it’s just disgusting.
WIL WHEATON: This is deadly. MORGAN WEBB: That outbreak basically shut down all of our proactive cure plans, and so we had to go straight defensive. And right now we’re basically just trying to contain all of the outbreaks. And I have to admit to you, it’s not looking good for us right now.
ROBERT GIFFORD: I’m gonna spend a card to fly to Khartoum, and take a cube off of Khartoum. I think that’s my best play that I can make. So I will fly to Khartoum.
ED BRUBAKER: Oh, yeah. OK. Except for the ones we already have. WIL WHEATON: I’m gonna go ahead and do this for you. ROBERT GIFFORD: Draw me some theoretically good cards.
Ugh. WIL WHEATON: How about another epidemic? ROBERT GIFFORD: Well that would not be good. WIL WHEATON: That’s not good at all.
ROBERT GIFFORD: I threw up in my mouth a little. MORGAN WEBB: How many epidemic cards are there? WIL WHEATON: Oh my God. The infection rate is now three, everybody. ED BRUBAKER: Oh, come on! WIL WHEATON: So that means we’re drawing three infection cards every turn.
Let’s find out– ED BRUBAKER: I thought we were actually doing really, really well. And then Wil informed me that we are actually losing. ROBERT GIFFORD: At this point things are kind of odd. And I feel like I should be flying you actually to an entirely separate location on the globe. MORGAN WEBB: OK. I find this interesting.
But go ahead. Because I feel like I am the only one containing this situation over here. ED BRUBAKER: Yeah, I was gonna say, she is like the Florence Nightingale of the zombie plague. ROBERT GIFFORD: Yeah. I guess that’s true. I just feel– MORGAN WEBB: I get called that a lot.
ED BRUBAKER: Either that or the Typhoid Mary of it. ROBERT GIFFORD: Sure. MORGAN WEBB: Go with the Florence Nightingale thing. WIL WHEATON: If we survive this turn, though– I think Morgan’s right.
If we survive this turn, she can wipe out Bangkok and Kolkata. ED BRUBAKER: Yeah. ROBERT GIFFORD: Yeah. WIL WHEATON: On her next turn. I mean, if you want to do that, right?
Because you’re sort of like– MORGAN WEBB: It’s tempting, because I’m there, and I just wanna remove those little things from the board. WIL WHEATON: They offend you, I can tell. MORGAN WEBB: I really don’t like them. WIL WHEATON: I know. You are role-playing the part of the medic very well. MORGAN WEBB: I want naught but to heal.
But what I actually want to do is try to be a little more forward-thinking, and actually try to cure some diseases. WIL WHEATON: It’s just wooden cubes on a board, but you care about those little wooden cubes. And it was bothering Morgan.
She was vibrating with energy, that she was unable to move one more city and save all those people. MORGAN WEBB: But I mean this is definitely my first action. ROBERT GIFFORD: That’s one. MORGAN WEBB: That’s one. I mean, that’s obvious. The only unfortunate thing is I wouldn’t be able to get back to Ho Chi Minh City if I do this.
WIL WHEATON: Right. MORGAN WEBB: Two, three. WIL WHEATON: And you can move to Hong Kong, or– I mean, you’re getting closer– you’re gonna be one away from where you want to be, no matter what.
ROBERT GIFFORD: Yeah, but I can move you actually, on my turn as well. I don’t have to just fly people places. I can move them one. ED BRUBAKER: We may not get to your turn.
ROBERT GIFFORD: What happened to the optimist? What happened to the optimist? MORGAN WEBB: A minute ago, we were gonna win this thing! ED BRUBAKER: I am looking at a serious problem, here, as a researcher. I am not sure we are gonna make three more turns. MORGAN WEBB: Every time we turned a card over we were so afraid of getting that epidemic card.
I mean, just that fear sticks in your brain as you turn it over, and you’re just– OK, phew. WIL WHEATON: Band-aid, Band-aid, Band-aid, just like a Band-aid! ED BRUBAKER: Oh. You get to keep that.
MORGAN WEBB: Sweet. Oh. That’s seven. ROBERT GIFFORD: You have to discard one.
MORGAN WEBB: OK. WIL WHEATON: And Bangkok. ROBERT GIFFORD: Look at that. You have to discard one, but you no longer need– MORGAN WEBB: I’m going to keep this one, because I feel like we’ve got some [BLEEP] going on over there. ED BRUBAKER: Shh.
MORGAN WEBB: I mean stuff. Whenever. WIL WHEATON: No, there is [BLEEP] going on over there. ED BRUBAKER: There’s a major amount of [BLEEP] with this disease, I am certain. WIL WHEATON: The odds are really against us. We’re probably down by four goals, with maybe 15 minutes in the third period.
And also we’re the Los Angeles Kings. It is my turn. I’m going to go one, two, three.
The zombie plague has been cured! So now, what this means is that anyone that anyone who goes to a place with a black cube can treat it the way Morgan can. We can wipe it out. If we get all the black cubes off the board, that disease is then sunsetted. MORGAN WEBB: That would be amazing.
WIL WHEATON: Which is great, because when those black cards come out it means that nothing happens. ROBERT GIFFORD: Actually, now, your ability is that any place that you walk through, you cure every cube. MORGAN WEBB: No! ROBERT GIFFORD: Yes. ED BRUBAKER: It doesn’t even count as an action.
ROBERT GIFFORD: Not even an action. MORGAN WEBB: But only for black, right? ROBERT GIFFORD: Just for black. ED BRUBAKER: So you have basically switched from Florence Nightingale to Jesus. MORGAN WEBB: This is the best game ever. ROBERT GIFFORD: Flo-Jo.
ED BRUBAKER: Flo-Jo! WIL WHEATON: I have one action left. ED BRUBAKER: If Wil went to Miami, then you could fly me to– oh, but that’s not gonna– I can get to Miami in my turn. ROBERT GIFFORD: Yeah. You’ll probably just walk over and give him a yellow card.
ED BRUBAKER: Yeah, I can just walk over to Miami. ROBERT GIFFORD: That’s fantastic. ED BRUBAKER: I’m Jesus, too. MORGAN WEBB: Was Jesus ever in Miami? ROBERT GIFFORD: This is a bad– ED BRUBAKER: [INAUDIBLE] talk to the Mormons. MORGAN WEBB: Guess it depends on who you ask.
ED BRUBAKER: Yeah. There’s a Tony award in that question. WIL WHEATON: There’s a lot of Jesuses in Miami. MORGAN WEBB: They’re named Jesus. WIL WHEATON: I’m sorry, I’m sorry.
My bad. ROBERT GIFFORD: I need to fly Morgan to the research station for sure, right? WIL WHEATON: Morgan, would you like to go to the research station? MORGAN WEBB: I would love to go to the research station.
Look how cozy and wonderful that place looks. ED BRUBAKER: Oh, because she’s– oh, now she can– MORGAN WEBB: Because I am about to cure some disease. I had the red cure in my hand. People were gonna name their children after me, because I had eradicated one of Earth’s great scourges. ROBERT GIFFORD: I think that my next best move would be to go and kind of deal with Santiago a bit, I think.
WIL WHEATON: I agree. ROBERT GIFFORD: Yeah, OK. ED BRUBAKER: There’s some drug muling going on. ROBERT GIFFORD: One, two, three.
And then I’ll take a cube off of Santiago. WIL WHEATON: OK. ED BRUBAKER: Just look the other way, dude. MORGAN WEBB: I don’t– it’s really unfortunate that that just happened. ED BRUBAKER: Oh, come on!
It’s even spinning! MORGAN WEBB: I know. It’s mocking us.
ROBERT GIFFORD: Yeah. WIL WHEATON: It’s so– why you gotta be like that, epidemic card? Alright, here we go!
ROBERT GIFFORD: Fortunately, there’s a lot to shuffle. ED BRUBAKER: Are they all the same? WIL WHEATON: We are increasing the infection rate indicator. ED BRUBAKER: Oh, yeah. WIL WHEATON: We are drawing a card off the bottom of the deck, which is Milan, in Italy.
And now there’s so many cards, I’m gonna do this. MORGAN WEBB: Three, right? ROBERT GIFFORD: Mm-hm. MORGAN WEBB: Afraid you were gonna say that.
WIL WHEATON: Alright. So listen. Before everybody yells at me, this is technically Robert’s turn. OK, ready? ROBERT GIFFORD: Alright. MORGAN WEBB: OK. WIL WHEATON: Khartoum OK. ED BRUBAKER: Just one?
ROBERT GIFFORD: Yeah. ED BRUBAKER: Oh, OK. WIL WHEATON: London. ED BRUBAKER: Oh, God. ROBERT GIFFORD: Oh, no, no, no! ROBERT GIFFORD: Yep.
ED BRUBAKER: Oh, no. And then Madrid hits everywhere. MORGAN WEBB: And now Madrid goes like this, and we’re out of blues. WIL WHEATON: Madrid hits here. ED BRUBAKER: And we lost the game. WIL WHEATON: Madrid hits London.
ROBERT GIFFORD: I think that we– I think that we go to skull. WIL WHEATON: We lose the game, actually, in two different ways. We lose the game on outbreaks, and we lose the game on– what did we decide that was?
Swine flu? MORGAN WEBB: The game was actually going pretty well. We had a lot of really good draws there towards the end. We had cures on the horizon. We’re like, we are gonna win this thing. And then we totally failed.
WIL WHEATON: I’m not even afraid of the zombie outbreak anymore. Even though it came up and it threw its worst at us, we kicked the zombie apocalypse in its undead nuts. It was H1Nerd1 that did us in. Everyone, we did the very best that we could. We tried– ED BRUBAKER: But Matt Damon– WIL WHEATON: We tried to save the world from the puking [BLEEP] death flu. ED BRUBAKER: Zombies– WIL WHEATON: We did stop zombies.
ROBERT GIFFORD: But H1Nerd1 cannot be stopped. WIL WHEATON: Yeah, turns out that the PAX flu– so whoever was patient zero at PAX in 2009, this loss is on you! Alright, let’s go to the couch of defeat. Pandemic box, you get to go downstairs to the victory wall.
Try not to gloat. Well, we did our best. MORGAN WEBB: Tell that to those people down there. WIL WHEATON: The people that Robert killed?
MORGAN WEBB: Yeah, those people. ROBERT GIFFORD: Hey, easy! Easy. I think we all killed them together, all right?
MORGAN WEBB: It was your turn. I think, for the record, it was your turn. ROBERT GIFFORD: Team effort. WIL WHEATON: I just want to point out– ED BRUBAKER: That people suck, and they deserved to die? WIL WHEATON: No.
No, no. I just want to point out that we really did have a lot of fun losing that game. MORGAN WEBB: That is true. WIL WHEATON: That was great! ED BRUBAKER: How much fun did the game have beating us?
WIL WHEATON: Well, I’ll find out when– ED BRUBAKER: I think we had more fun. WIL WHEATON: Maybe. I’ll ask the game when I go downstairs to talk to it at the wall of victory. Right before I punch it in the face.
Listen, you guys, we don’t like anyone to go home empty-handed when you come and play on Tabletop. So we’ve given you a parting gift. There was bubonic plague in your water. MORGAN WEBB: That is so sweet.
WIL WHEATON: I know. MORGAN WEBB: You think of everything. WIL WHEATON: I do. ROBERT GIFFORD: Is that swelling?